Another day

Sarah had to do some stuff today so I had to make my own breakfast and stuff, it was no big deal. After I was all made up, I headed out to the office where I went through the usual routine. An old buddy of mine from the past stopped me in the hallway and commented that he wondered what was going on with me. I was a lot less friendly to the crew than I had been. It seemed like I had become all business. I was not really sure what to tell him.

I told him that there was some stuff going on with a good friend of mine, and that it was making me less inclined to just hang out and such. He seemed to accept the answer but still invited me over for the weekly poker night that I had been missing out on. From what I had gathered from him, I was still close to the people in my old department since I had been their manager for a couple of years before my promotion.

At least I will be able to use a girly excuse as to why I do not want to drink on Sunday. And I will not even be lying either which is the best part. What I really noticed was that my autopilot was not forcing me to flirt with him. It was giving me very receptive expressions and movements but not suggesting anything other than me going over there for poker.

Another little day in my life, time to go home from work.

- Carolyn

Business Is Good

Spent most of the day at the office, typing up things, scheduling things and seeing the pictures that Bree and Tonya were in. They were going to processed as soon as possible and then used for promotional materials for the company. My boss liked them and everything. Also he wanted them to both be signed on as soon as possible so their contracts were mailed off as well so that they could not picked up by rival companies. My sisters will soon be my employees.

What I find most interesting about those girls is that it seems like they always end up doing some sort of carnal act. Now I have no proof but the report from the photographers have told me that they seemed very comfortable with one another. They also were a little flirtatious during the shoot and seemed to give off the signals that they were more than just friends.

I am not sure how to feel about Tonya having sex with Bree. It is fine, just that I gave her someone to be with, I am not sure why she needed Bree too. It sort of makes the more protective part of me think that there may be a little more to the idea that she wants to help me.

*shrug*

I will figure it all out soon enough. But until then I will promote the two of them as the sexy girls they are!

-Carolyn

Autopilot And Me

Work has been super busy, I have a lot that I need to get through before I can even head back to Miami. It kind of sucks since I am hearing that there is quite a lot going on down there. But still I think what with the war the body and I are having that it is for the best. Today I did something that made me feel really relaxed, I did not just let myself fall into autopilot when I was getting ready. I did all of the motions that I had seen her make for weeks now. I put on the makeup myself. It was odd because it felt..good to do so. I think it is sort of a reward system.

If I do it myself then it will not do it for me and will actually make me feel good about doing it. I made a couple of mistakes but when I thought I was done, it fixed them. So it seems like it just matters if I am trying. This is an interesting part of this little predicament I have. I will need to talk to one of my sisters and see if I let it dip into autpilot and flirt to see how far it goes. And then when I take control if I can control how far it does.

I think that would be a good idea so that I do not have to avoid men like the plague. At work, I have become a little more friendly to them but it is still hard for me to be buddies with them just yet. So until I figure out this system, I will just continue to be the Cold Carolyn that they seemed to have named me at the Water cooler.

A Regular Sunday...

Regular blah of a Sunday, woke up and then tried to assert control of this body when I made to the bathroom. I was not going to let it get ready, but it pushed back. I stood there in front of the mirror looking like I was putting all of my effort in not moving. My arms felt like they were on fire, and eventually the body won that battle forcing the hands to work to putting on my makeup and such. In between the forced expressions, there was a dirty look on my face directed back at my body as if it could see how displeased I was with it.

After it was all done and things were put away, I walked over to my bed with a pout and crossed my arms not pleased that it seemed to keep winning every round. Part of me wanted to throw something but I refrained and just sat there looking at myself in the mirror. This is exactly why I do not want to even try something like sex, I am sure the body would get to have its fun. I would be forced along with tasks that I do not even really want to do.

After being in a pout for ten minutes, I went downstairs and had breakfast with Sarah and then went shopping for stuff. Electronics had been the love of my past. So I bought a new phone and shopped around for some other things. I had to play the dodge men game since I knew how this body would react. Do you know how hard it is to find purely female representatives in a electronics store? Let me tell you, it is difficult.

So after shopping and stuff, I came home and had dinner with Sarah. I did not learn anything new but she had remarked that she liked whatever change had come over me. So it seems there is still me in here. But that just got me wondering, what was Carolyn like in her day to day life?

- Carolyn

Slippery Slopes

Tonya came closer than I felt comfortable with today. She..nearly tempted me into something after I had been sort of teasing her with this new body of mine. The biggest issue is that I really know how to flirt with her because I am attracted to her, so that means that the body actually helps me do it. That is a dangerous combination as it got me a little to close to doing something sexual. I am not afraid of sex, I just do not want to go down that road yet. I need to be more in control, more sure of things before I let it happen.

Nothing was more clear than a few minutes ago where I had literally gotten Tonya to strip for me in front of her camera. So I still have the ability to control others but still it is my personal control that scares and eludes me. I mean I am more controlled than Bree, Olivia or Tonya, but still I need to be more assured that when I go down that road that I will be the one holding the reins and not my body.

To show my body who is boss, I took a picture without makeup:

Also, Bree and Tonya are going to be having a beach photo shoot tomorrow so the two of them can begin the modeling life. So at least in my professional life things are going quite good.

Good night lovelies!

- Carolyn

My Connection to Others...

Since I have been home, I started to realize some things. Carolyn had a boyfriend merely a few days before I took over for her. She broke up with him because she found out that he had cheated on her. Sarah told me that I had been crying the night of the change, so she was not surprised that I left to go somewhere. I am glad that he has not tried calling me or anything like that. I do want to have to deal with the knowledge that this body is far from virginal. I could nearly gag, that is how grossed out I am at the thought of being with a guy.

Even though that was sort of the highlight of my day, I worked and such to get all of the teams ready to survey major cities and get us materials. I plan on getting Tonya to model for me. She is a very sexy girl and it would help to give her a job rather than her being just my kept girl. I think she would feel to obligated to do things if she was just taken care of. I do not want her to feel obligated to anything.

Yet, I was a little surprised when I saw her blog. She is pretty lonely down there in Miami, so I think I am going to send her some company. I was looking at the registry that the escort service had down there and found the one girl I was attracted to. A sign that she was much like us so she would understand what Tonya was going through. So I paid them and sent her off.

I do my best to help others, but I still refuse to partake in the acts that my peers seem so eager to oblige themselves in. But do not worry about me, the frustration does not even get to me. Heck, most of the time I do not even think about it.

But I think I am rambling now, so I am going to log out of here and sleep.

Back to New York

Tonya dropped me off at the airport like a good girl. I did not like getting up early in the morning but my body was able to handle all of the prep in the most efficient way. It is kind of nice that I do not really have to get up in the mornings. But still I had to grab coffee so that I was not going to be a grouch when I got on the plane.

Arriving in New York, I did a little happy dance before grabbing the taxi. My apartment was just the way that I had left it, though I found out that there was a live in maid in it. She keeps the place clean, makes meals and so forth. I was surprised I had not seen her beforehand. But Sarah told me that she had slept through me leaving that morning.

Luckily she was still being paid automatically from my account, so she continued to clean and such even though she was not receiving any instruction from me. I appreciated it and gave her a bit of a tip. Sadly though, I was not attracted to her even though she is pretty cute. Just means that she is a full bodied girl which is not a bad thing. But after her making me breakfast, I headed to the office.

Work was long as is usual. I am getting stuff done, though sadly a lot of what needs to be done, has to be done here in New York. I will make it back to Miami soon enough. But it is bed time for me so good night lovelies.